Wednesday, February 14, 2007

The Most Incredible American Idol Post Ever...


A couple of years ago now (OK, two full American Idol seasons ago) I caught the American Idol bug while spending almost all of my time in a hospital, taking care of my then very sick Mum.

“Triple” pneumonia.

Imagine that?

Three times the normal amount of pneumonia... All in the lungs of a seventy year old lady.

I wrote about that here-- “American Idol, Bo Bice, And My Mother's Vagina…”

We lost Mum mentally for a few months back then, and it was American Idol that helped bring her back. Music. Lyrics. Old songs that trigger human thoughts and memories. Life. It all came back to Mum and I watched it happen.

If I were to name one thing outside of familial influences that helped my Mum get well, both physically and mentally, It was American Idol. Kind of hard to believe, yes. But sometimes, schmaltzy heals...

These days, Mum and I watch American Idol like old pros. We know the nuances of each judge. We listen and we watch. We complain about the bad editing in this part of the program and we complain to the television screen itself about it. That box never listens.

God, those American Idol people are so stupid. They rip right through hell week and show very few singers- either the ones who made it through or the ones who didn’t.

“Heck“, we say, “they could do about eight hours of showing the auditions and millions would watch every one“.

Show the great singers who weren’t good enough to “go all the way”. Show the great singers who were good enough. Show everybody singing, so that those who made it to LA can at least have THAT to show for their trip there. I mean, you get accepted to go to LA, you make it there for a few days and then you just miss the final cut, and not a mention by the idiots who edit American Idol and produce it. I think that stinks for those people! I do! Mum does too!

Phooey on them for not giving everybody a few moments of fame! Phooey, I say!

Man, that is a lot of advertising dollars pissed into the wind!!

Man, that is a lot of talent going by the wayside…

Man, that is a lot of personal stories that never got told.

Man, that’s a lot of talented voices, that never got shared with America, even for a few minutes…

What a waste.

Most of you know me enough to know I am a bit on the rough and tumble side. I’m scarred. I have a high tolerance for pain. I mix it up a bit and I get a little dirty…

But do you know that I ball my eyes out, every time someone hits a beautiful and pure note on that damn TV show?

It’s true. It’s a blubber fest.

I am the blubberer.

There is something profoundly beautiful about a human who can sing in tune, with passion and fire and feeling, and it turns me into jelly.

Yes, I confess. Tears dripping off my bottom jaws like rain off of eaves. I can hardly keep my vision clear enough to see the TV.

It is all I can do to keep from actually whimpering…

I sniffle as my nose runs. I wipe my face on my sleeve constantly.

I am reduced to a kind of rare happiness that allows me to unleash a maelstrom of feelings in a fleeting moment.


But don’t tell anyone about it.


Or I will break your bones.

13 comments:

none said...

I like good singers too. Some of them are very moving.

When I worked in a Karaoke joint some folks would come in and rock everyone's socks off. Those were the enjoyable times. Most everyone else was bunch of off key of drunks
looking to play grab ass.

I don't watch idol myself. I can't watch mean people. It messes with my mood.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I do the same thing. When people can sing, really sing, it's such an amazing thing to me. What a gift to have.

Anonymous said...

I already guessed that about you.

You're a big softie. Pure and simple!

Scott from Oregon said...

mean people mess with your mood Hammer?

are you saying Simon gets to you?

You shouold hear my Mum give Simon the what for.

it's like watching granny argue with a STOP sign.

Simon knows what the producers know. Conflict is attractive.

Don't believe me? Watch what happens when two people in a restaurant quarrel. The whole restaurant pays attention....

Kylie, I am not soft. More like a hard candy left in the sun...

Anonymous said...

I'd be one of those guys that go "But...but... but my friends say I'm a great singer!"

Jeannie said...

Idol's ok - but I don't like pop. Rockstar was better. I can't say I cry when they hit it but yes, my heart soars. Must be a physiological thing huh?

Cheesy said...

>>>passing a tissue,,quit using your sleeve silly.
You should try an opera,, Ya I know the music is errg but the voices surround your brain..it's amazing

little things said...

I shudder to admit that my kids have got me taking a peek at American Idol now and then... but only from the kitchen, as I stir the sauce or flip the burgers...

CS said...

Ah ha! The truth at last!

Anonymous said...

Scoot, I had no idea you were so ....sensitive. :D
/jo

Jean said...

Your secret is safe... I so hate pain!

Unknown said...

A good voice can make your soul vibrate. There's nothing like it.

slaghammer said...

I prefer blues but classical music will occasionally get me all mushy.