Friday, September 22, 2006

Mums The Word--

I got lucky. My Mum sings like an angel. When she sings, you know you are in the presence of a singer. No shower faux accoustics for this lady. I mean, think American Grandma Idol... The Captain and Me Mum...

Mum is also the second sweetest person I know. And no matter what I've been up to, she's forgiven me. In fact, my Mum forgave me by the time I was two, for everything I would get up to after that.

How cool is that?

A Mum with prescience...

One of my new contributors to AELEOPE has shared a wonderfully written anecdote about her Mum. Her Mum would eat me for lunch. Her Mum would eat me for dinner. Her Mum would poop me in the morning like a kernal of corn.

I think I like her Mum already. Here is her blog--

And here is her Mum as only a daughter can see her...

Sat-Sun, Latin and the Art of Chewing Gum
I never win with my mother. She is never wrong. I shouldn’t say ‘never’ because that isn’t strictly accurate. My mother is correct 98.43% of the time. This has been documented. She is also wickedly funny and this, too, has been documented.

When I was twelve and a bigger smartass than I am now, I told my mother I knew I was adopted. Without missing a beat she replied, “Yes, but we’re not going to tell you until you’re twenty-one and you can handle it.”

Several years ago, I was trying to figure out the meaning of a Latin phrase. My mom took Latin in high school (oops, just dated both of us) and she’s very good at language etiology. So I called her and said, “You speak Latin, right?”

“No wonder you kids don’t understand a thing I say,” she responded.

A few years later we were driving down one of the main drags in town, in an area that is mostly residential. We passed a house that had apparently been converted into an antique store. A sign in the yard said: Open Sat-Sun.

I said, “What’s Sat-Sun?”

“I’m not sure, but I think it’s in February,” she answered.

My mother called me the other day. I always screen my calls and so I let the machine answer. After about ten seconds she said, “Oh, I forgot to talk.” She said something after that, but I was laughing too hard to catch it. I’ve made fun of her for a week over that little episode – and for a week, she has taken it graciously and with good cheer. I sent her an email and scrolled about halfway down the page, where I wrote, “Ooops. I forgot to type!”

Today I was chewing a piece of gum and concentrating on something else. Most people don’t need to concentrate on gum-chewing. I missed the gum entirely and bit my lip so hard it bled.

Tonight I had dinner with Mom. A woman walked by the car as we were getting out. My mother stopped talking. When I looked at her she said, “That woman was chewing gum. I just wanted to see if she would bite her lip.”

Somehow, some way, she always wins.

I will never mock my mother again. At least not with gum in my mouth.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ok. I just restored my iphone 3G since i was having some problems and backed it up but all of my songs and apps are not on my phone any more. Does anyone know how to get them back on because i dont want to pay for them again and i dont even remember half of them. Thx. PLEASE HELP!!

[url=]unlock iphone[/url]