Friday, September 22, 2006

I'm So BAAAAAAAD, I Can't Remember Where I got This--

This "card" has been kicking around the bottom of my shopping bag full of photos for as long as I can remember. The trouble is, I don't remember where I got it.

I mean, under what circumstances would I be handed a card like this, where I would put it in my pocket, bring it home, place it in a safe place where I would dig it out of a Christmas bag full of old photos years later and wonder how old this girl is now and does her backside still look like that?

I'm almost proud to not remember. I must have had a good time...

I got this e-mail from a longtime cyber friend who frequented a blog I used to frequent and followed me here. I know she won't mind my being provocative and publishing her e-mail. She said so. Right here--

"Scottie, I adore hearing about your Mum and think you’re doing a wonderful job looking after her, but sometimes I hanker after the provocative,wordy arse who used to annoy people so much on the RP comments. Your stories are fascinating and tell of a wealth of experience, but you don’t seem to be trying to get up people’s noses any more. Perhaps that is a childish pastime but I used to enjoy sitting sniggering as Angie attempted to take the high moral ground over you, whilst you never put yourself in the position of competing.
Enough of this! I swear I’ll try to think of an anecdote sometime…"
All good wishes
Carol


Carol-- I still get up the noses of a few people. I just do it randomly, now. I found a guy making his peepee mark high up on a low curb by taking the micky out of Steve Irwin. I turned him into a jigsaw puzzle with the corner pieces chewed by my dog.

I had a girl from cyberdating land ask me if I was a tits and ass man, implying she had both. I said "No. Strictly vaginaman." She deleted me right quick...

I grew up with an acerbic sister and the barbs come too easily. I'm too flippant with flippancy. I'm trying to reform...

Think that you are witnessing the Great Reformation Of Scotty-- it might make things less painful. You might feel more at ease as you wean yourself of my provacative, wordy, arseness...

Or then again, find me a worthy opponent...

But you do have a point.
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7 comments:

Stucco said...

This above all: to thine own self be true - Billy S.

Fuck the fucking fuckers if they can't deal with the filppant flippancy.

Rave on, my man. Cheers.

Anonymous said...

gee,thanks for publishing.that's what I get for mailing you after half a bottle of wine.i'm glad you're not an arse man, though. ever hear from angie?

Anonymous said...

It's not flipancy. in or family its called channling nanna.

Dads maother was a bitch of legendary proportons. She could cut people into little bits without them even knowing vtill they went to leave and fell apart. She was excellent.

And it's good to know that she is not just haunting family.

Keep up the random bursts!!!

Anonymous said...

Dude, that's my picture! I can't believe you don't remember me (sigh).

And yes, my backside still looks like that.

Scott from Oregon said...

capricorn cringe--If your backside still looks like that, may I suggest you back your way into everything you could possibly ever want...

tisty- channeling nanna? You know, it was my sister who started it all. She was the terse and sarcastic one. I just learned the trade secrets so I could compete, me being so competitive and all...

carol--I was gonna lay into you like I would if you were angie and see if I could make you snigger. I decided that you must have had a half bottle of wine and I wouldn't get any if I wasn't at least superficially kind to you...

angie has been busy at work, and she vacationed in Europe for a bit, and I am awaiting an email with meat but haven't recieved it yet...

Stucco--You shit stirrer, you...

Nobody who comes to my site so far deserves the special treatment. Maybe we should all go out asshole hunting. I'll bring my quiver...

Stucco said...

Guilty as charged :)

Vulgar Wizard said...

I just found this guy, scott from oregon, up my damned nose! What the hell!?!?!?!?