Monday, March 01, 2010

Skiing On Mt. Ashlando...



Sunday turned out to be a glorious day to go skiing up on Mt. A. There was blue skies and fairly new snow all machine groomed just right for my archaic downhill racing skiis.

All day long, as I whizzed past the younger skiiers and snow boarders while in a downhill semi-tuck, I thought "I AM WAY TOO OLD TO BE GOING THIS FAST!!"

But that didn't stop me.

I even did a few Bodie-Millertime-fly-through-the-air-and-wave-your-arms-around airborn manuevers after hitting small bumps at high speeds.

Being a little reckless and irresponsible with one's bones is part of the thrill of it all, isn't it?

My ski buddy can't ski on Sunday and the weather was too perfect to not go, so I went by myself which is fine except you sometimes ride up on the chair with some unusual characters.

The worst of all was a kindly family man who had brought his whole family up. They were all taking lessons while he headed for the top of the mountain and more challenging skiing. The problem with this guy was that he got on the chair with a giant goober hanging out of his left nostril. Not all the way out, just far enough out that I had to look at it to talk to him.

"Good Gawd!" I thought. "What a goober!"

He didn't seem to mind.

And you can't just tell someone you just met and don't know that they have a goober hanging out of their nose. So you look away and try to pretend it isn't there until he tells you something about his ski mask which forces you to look back.

And there it'll be. Every damn time he breaths in and out, the damn thing MOVES but he doesn't feel it and you are getting mesmerized by it like a train wreck as the lift just slowly swings its way up the mountain.

So you try and touch your nose where a goober would be, gently informing your new chair-mate that he has one godawful hanger visible there.

And he DOESN'T GET THE HINT!

So finally, just as the chair is approaching the off-loading ramp, you spill it out, only it comes out louder and more accusatory because you've bottled it up inside for the last three minutes all to yourself--

"DUDE! YOU'VE GOT A GIANT GOOBER HANGING OUT OF YER NOSE!"

The next time you're in the lift line, and you call out "SINGLE!", you figure he'll be unable to join you in the line...

3 comments:

Jeannie said...

You should say:

You've got a bat out of the cave.

Dogbait said...

Why did I have to read that just at dinner time!

kario said...

I love it.

If I ever find myself on a chairlife with you, please tell me if my fly is open or I have a huge booger hanging out. I'll consider it a friendly thing to do.